Not Untitled.
I’m probably a scary alien.

I’m probably a scary alien.

I’ll admit that this morning I couldn’t fit my arms in a super cute blue lace dress that I own and it sort of ruined my day. So what I have buff Manish arms, I also have a flat stomach and awesome legs so who gives a fuck.

I’d get punched just like that doctor if my sister knew I told the Internet her drunk hospital story but that year I totally didn’t get thanksgiving dinner because of her drunk shenanigans and also had no food and ate nachos from 7-11 to stay alive since I was supposed to be going to my parents for thanksgiving and worked the night before until 2am and didn’t buy food to eat so she can deal with it.

I’d get punched just like that doctor if my sister knew I told the Internet her drunk hospital story but that year I totally didn’t get thanksgiving dinner because of her drunk shenanigans and also had no food and ate nachos from 7-11 to stay alive since I was supposed to be going to my parents for thanksgiving and worked the night before until 2am and didn’t buy food to eat so she can deal with it.

One time my sister went to the hospital for being too drunk and ripped her catheter out twice and punched a doctor in the face so I’ll always be the well behaved one no matter how often I post on the Internet while drunk.

Stars - No One Is Lost
48 plays

ohsoquickly:

Put your hands up ‘cause everybody dies…

Umm, that ruinten was strong and I’m feeling it but I want another beer. All I bought today was Stone because here on the west coast it has claimed the spot of favorite brewery though when I’m in Michigan it is still Bell’s, I just can’t get it here.

Umm, that ruinten was strong and I’m feeling it but I want another beer. All I bought today was Stone because here on the west coast it has claimed the spot of favorite brewery though when I’m in Michigan it is still Bell’s, I just can’t get it here.